Saturday, January 20, 2007
Nothing is worth it now. Crying won't solve anything, just make me feel even worse. Now im stuck here all alone with a million questions running through my mind. How? Why? Maybe if I close my eyes forever it will ease the pain.. I just don't know. *sigh.. and nothing left to do. Through these tears i force this broken smile.. :(
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Saturday, January 13, 2007
So whats everyones secret, its the same right, what are u most afraid to tell someone about anything, its not rejection it isnt even doubt that theyll understand u, its human nature.
For all the people living 'life' as we call it no matter how far we go how much we do its never enough, there can only be momentary satisfaction and then there is darkness and imperfection all over again, so whats the use,,, right now figuring out lifes purpose is the least of any ones worries.
For a moment hail peace the most fragile flower becoming its essence, and listen ,,, for a moment imagine and then wake up its a dream nothing is true the earth isnt even round. Everyone defines themselves by something they do that nobody else does. But the very few peolpe who are that good always find that they need to be better as well so the circle continues, we can never be at any place we want to be because we never know when to stop. we find role models in other people try to adapt and imitate them losing our personality in the rush for an image of 'acceptance' or even 'achievement' Mirror Mirror on the wall whos the fairset of them all. It lies quote House MD, everybody lies!!
For all the people living 'life' as we call it no matter how far we go how much we do its never enough, there can only be momentary satisfaction and then there is darkness and imperfection all over again, so whats the use,,, right now figuring out lifes purpose is the least of any ones worries.
For a moment hail peace the most fragile flower becoming its essence, and listen ,,, for a moment imagine and then wake up its a dream nothing is true the earth isnt even round. Everyone defines themselves by something they do that nobody else does. But the very few peolpe who are that good always find that they need to be better as well so the circle continues, we can never be at any place we want to be because we never know when to stop. we find role models in other people try to adapt and imitate them losing our personality in the rush for an image of 'acceptance' or even 'achievement' Mirror Mirror on the wall whos the fairset of them all. It lies quote House MD, everybody lies!!
Friday, January 12, 2007
Friday, January 05, 2007
Another moment of my life passes by as i sit here thinking of what could have been. What if.. How about.. Maybe.. Nothing is worth it. I now realize that. I have made a big mistake. But the only mistake was loving you. Is that such a crime? I can now say even after days that i still love you more than words unspoken.
Before you came into my life, it really had no purpose. Going to school. Getting good grades. Studying. Playing 'round with a couple friends. Going to the movies having a good time.. I had a lot but i knew something was missing. I didn't really know what until the day i met you. When you came it was like my life was perfect. No worries. Everything was going my way for once. I know it sound wierd but its true...
And when you left its like my world just came to an end. Its like i had no purpose. Like this happiness was too much. I guess I was just blinded. And now im here staring at the screen, tears in my eyes. Thinking about what could have been. And listening to this sad song :
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out. I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while. Even though going on with you gone still upsets me. There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok. But that's not what gets me. What hurts the most. Was being so close. And having so much to say. And watching you walk away. And never knowing what could have been And not seeing that loving you. Is what I was tryin' to do. It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go. But I'm doin' It. It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone. Still Harder Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret. But I know if I could do it overI would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart that I left unspoken..
Before you came into my life, it really had no purpose. Going to school. Getting good grades. Studying. Playing 'round with a couple friends. Going to the movies having a good time.. I had a lot but i knew something was missing. I didn't really know what until the day i met you. When you came it was like my life was perfect. No worries. Everything was going my way for once. I know it sound wierd but its true...
And when you left its like my world just came to an end. Its like i had no purpose. Like this happiness was too much. I guess I was just blinded. And now im here staring at the screen, tears in my eyes. Thinking about what could have been. And listening to this sad song :
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out. I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while. Even though going on with you gone still upsets me. There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok. But that's not what gets me. What hurts the most. Was being so close. And having so much to say. And watching you walk away. And never knowing what could have been And not seeing that loving you. Is what I was tryin' to do. It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go. But I'm doin' It. It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone. Still Harder Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret. But I know if I could do it overI would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart that I left unspoken..
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